Monday, November 21, 2005

Ann Coulter Needs a Sandwich. Now.

I suggest the Hardee's Monster Thickburger. Weighing in at something like 4lbs and packing 1,400 calories (900+ from fat), thus hunk of nastyness might provide Coulter the sustenance she's lacking.

With loads of sodium to normalise her electrolytes, tons of carbs to provide energy, and an infusion of protein for muscle growth, the Thickbuger may bring Coulter down from the far right wing hate-o-sphere she's been floating around in since God knows when (she may have consumed a bit of the bad acid at one of the 60+ Grateful Dead shows she attended, prompting a seismic shift in her brain chemistry). We caution her, though. This is quite the liberal helping - just look at all the girth in its chassis.

But if anyone needs a little girth in her chassis, it's Coulter. Cuz she's looking a little puke-y. For more of this wondernut's unfair and chemically imbalanced ravings, check out her holiday greeting to the Arab world at her website, pick up one of her best-selling books, or watch dirty old men fawn over her on Fox News.

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